My kids say I have a look… one that is absolutely terrifying… lol… I don’t know what that looks like I am always too mad to glance at a mirror. If I did happen to look into a mirror…with said face… I would probably laugh my ass off…I get mad very quick it’s the Irish and Italian in me…I don’t stay mad though…
Now with a daughter whose moved out and on her own. A son who will be a senior in high school next year. I have been reflecting on those hectic younger years. I was so stressed, so worried…I was not doing the right thing for them. It is a constant cycle,once those babies are born. Your job is to nurture, teach, discipline, and love them… sometimes every emotion, every minute, of every day.
This is where mom guilt comes in. My gosh I still have it and my kids are practically grown. Should I spend time reading that book I have had for a year? Should I play a game on my computer? Is it ok to have leftovers and not cook after being on my feet and working all day…parenting is tough. It is work everyday. Just like marriages, work, and friendships. It is consistent tug of war and overwhelming at times.
Mom standards are ridiculous and confusing. Stay home! Go to work! You must breastfeed your kids! Homemade baby food the only way! Formula is the only complete nutrition…yada…yada! Perfection is overrated. I am so grateful for the patience my kids have shown me. I am grateful for the advice of parents, grandparents, friends, coworkers…bottom line though… your the mom… they are your kids…no one else’s…so you figure out what is best for them, and for you. It is a process…(yes, it still is) there is no one all encompassing way to parent or be a mom. You just are…it’s work.
I am sure if there was a mom manual mine would be as thick as a dictionary, filled with all the mistakes I have made. I am human. I am not perfect by any means. Admitting you are wrong is a good step. Apologize when you yell. Try to make them understand you love them…but your upset or angry too…it’s ok. Kids can see when we are not perfect. They are observant. They know things. Just like when you use there whole name…they are in trouble…or when they get grounded from something they love…it becomes infinitely more valuable. Without lessons, without mistakes we would not be moms… we would not be humans.
That is all I have tonight friends…life and writing are a work in progress…(just like me)😉
PS this post is dedicated to my sister Laura who suggested I write about the mom look… well done sis… we are moms together.
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